How Well Do You Know Your Famous 90s San Francisco Buildings?

Given that: I had a day off to putz around in San Francisco this weekend, and given that: I have done just about every touristy thing there is to do in San Francisco already, and given that: I had children in the 90s and thus the entertainment industry pretty much became dead to me at that point, and given that: roughly 87.3% of television and movies filmed in the 90s were set in San Francisco, and given that: I love the 90s as I was so young and virile and womens’ hair was so big, I decided to myself, “What better way to spend a day putzing around San Francisco than looking up houses and buildings that served as the settings for 90s television and movies?!”

So armed with Google and a comfortable pair of shoes, I proceeded to build my calf muscles by schlepping the hills of this horizontally-challenged city in search of famous inanimate edifices.  Below are the results in the form of a reader quiz to test your own Famous 90s San Francisco Houses and Buildings Knowledge with my very own Famous 90s San Francisco Houses and Buildings Tour Quiz.  I took all the pictures myself last Saturday except for the ones that didn’t turn out.  Those I stole from Wikipedia or Google.  The answer key is at the end with which to measure your fresh pimpin’ 90sness.  Lace up your Air Jordans and slap on your bracelets cuz here we go… Continue reading

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#OscarsSoNotMe

So I’ve decided to boycott the Oscars this year. I categorically am stating to you, the reader, and all the world for that matter, this simple fact: I will not be attending next month’s Academy Awards. (Excuse me for a moment…GMA is about to call.) The primary reason, of course, is that I was not invited. Again. Plus I am somewhat disgusted by their egoistic self-congratulatory nature. And once the opening monologue is over, they are about as interesting as C-SPAN at 2 a.m. after a couple doses of NyQuil. But those are only the main reasons.

The host of secondary reasons I will be shunning the seemingly unshunnable include the fact that the extensive list of nominees is about as diverse as a Northern Wisconsin deer camp. Scanning the list, I almost feel as if I am not welcome into the community. Nowhere is there anyone who looks like me. Nowhere is there a Continue reading

How to Be an Award-Winning Blogger

I have been blogging now for exactly 18+ months or so (give or take) and I must say, I am all Baghdadified (that is, in shock and awe) that I have not received any smugly satisfactory and pretentiously praiseful honors from within my own pompous peer group such that I can properly puff myself up with conceited pride and self-important pomposity.  Nor have I even received a nomination!

But then I watched television last Sunday night and what I discovered via the Columbia Broadcasting System made me involuntarily exclaim, “Oh Lorde!  I have been doing it all wrong!”  I have been foolishly just sitting at my computer and writing, not at all using the obvious tactical strategery it takes to be an esteemed and celebrated success in one’s chosen field.  How could I have not seen it sooner?

Being the unselfish egoist I am, I will share what I learned the other night Continue reading

Am I Racist if I Don’t Use Colored Pencils or I Do?

Pardon my provocative controversy, but I think I have decided to ditch my mild-mannered nine-to-five job and venture into the much more lucrative racism industry.  Instigators like Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson (not to mention 24-hr news channels) are pulling in some serious coinage by simply pointing out the oppressive nature of systems or depictions or incidents based entirely on race and/or the color of one’s skin.  The Rev. Al Sharpton has reportedly amassed a net worth of about $5 million by telling us how oppressed he is; Jesse Jackson, $10 million.

Not to toot my own proverbial ‘cracker-ass’ horn, but I could totally do that.  While I may lack certain qualifications like not being a ‘Reverend’ or having a love child, I do have the ability to distinguish races and colors and can point out when one is being intolerably differentiated from another. Continue reading

Super Sunday Showdown!

Unless you are holed up in your Afghani cave or your right-wing Idaho compound or your own roomy derriere, you are probably aware that Sunday night provided an extraordinary epic battle between two potent powerhouses that left observers breathless as the combatants conflicted and contested like two gladiators engaged in a ferocious life-and-death struggle in front of an audience of millions, nay, billions of screaming blood-thirsty onlookers.  Of course, I speak of no other than that treacherous and violent clash of…

SuperBowl v. Downton

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