Your Very Own conTIMplating Holiday Gift Guide

An underrated gift idea.  Collect all 32 varieties!

An underrated gift idea. Collect all 32!

Well Fa-la-la, Rumpa-pum-pum, and Ring-ting-tingling too!  Nonsense syllables are flying around higher than a paint-sniffing reindeer and The Carpenters are actually getting radio play!  This can only mean it’s that time of year when we once again don our red hats and roll up our Greensleeves and get our shop on for the purpose of celebrating Christmas your preferred inoffensive non-specific winter holiday of good feelings and cheer!  Yahoo*!

*(The aforementioned exclamation of enthusiastic holiday merriment is neither endorsed by nor affiliated with the popular internet portal.  Thank you for not suing me.)

Now I know that getting that perfect gift for that special someone is a bigger hassle than doing one’s hair in the late 80s, so I have wasted upwards of numerous minutes to provide the followers of this very fine blog of electronic wonderment with a time-saving and awe-inspiring

conTIMplating Holiday Gift Guide For Gift Givers Who Give Gifts To People Who In Turn Receive Said Gifts Continue reading

Mission Opossum-able

As the year-end approaches, the internally redundant question that is often asked and repeated by the likes of Johnny Mathis, Harry Connick, and Rod Stewart is: “What are you doing New Year’s…New Year’s Eve?”  A popular New Year’s activity is to watch people drop things.  This is usually done while consuming copious amounts of alcohol and so the most commonly dropped item is one’s inhibitions, but there are any number of more tangible items to watch being dropped all around the world.

Perhaps the best-known dropped item is New York’s Times Square ball.  This is a tradition that started over 100 years ago and has more recently come to symbolize how many times Mayor Michael “Compared To Me Scrooge McDuck Is A Pauper” Bloomberg has himself dropped the ball during his administration.  Continue reading

From All of Me Here at…

During this season of frosty snowmen, resting gentlemen and geese getting fat, may the ring-ting-tingling of silver bells deck your halls with such ding-donging merrily on high that good king Wenceslas comes a-wassailing and may your lovely branches be just like the ones you used to know.  And while you’re rockin’ around the Christmas tree with Parson Brown and your mommy’s kissing Santa Claus amidst delightful fires, may you remember that silent, holy night in the little town of Bethlehem that brought joy to the world.  In other words… Continue reading

Uninformed Because of Holiday Distractions? This May Help…

Here we are in mid-December—the time of year when, amidst our holiday bustle, we begin to pause and somberly reflect on why this is the only time of the year anybody ever uses the word ‘bustle.’  It is also the time of year when we don’t really pay much attention to what is going on in the world in terms of history-making and/or altering news stories because we here in the West are so reverently focused on the birth of the Christ child and all the frantic patriotic consumerism it affords.

Combine that with 93% of all US network coverage being about either Lindsay Lohan or a make-believe crisis wherein Democrats and Republicans are making an hubristic grab for money and power by pretending to be Thelma and Louise, and it creates The Perfect Storm of Notorious movie-title metaphors. Continue reading