Seattle: Where Only the Jokes Are Dry

What a gorgeous city!  This is the best picture of Seattle that I have ever stolen from Wikipedia.

What a gorgeous city! This is the best picture of Seattle that I have ever stolen from Wikipedia.

Let me just start out by saying that Seattle is my favorite city in North America, and that includes the likes of Hell (Michigan), Saint-Louis-du-Ha! Ha! (Quebec), and My Large Intestine (Texas).  Founded in the 1850s as ‘Duwamp,’ the name was changed in honor of Chief Si’ahl of the spectacularly spelled Dkhw’Duw’Absh tribe because they were pretty sure nobody would ever buy an album of a band from Duwamp.

Seattle initially flourished from the lumber and Chinese race riot industries.  It later became a launching point and market center for the Klondike Gold Rush of the 1890s and a development center for the Dot Com Gold Rush in the 1990s.  It is located in Washington State on a strip of land sandwiched between Puget Sound and the Cascade Mountains, both of which provide a natural barrier from the state’s Republicans. Continue reading

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Jumping on the Banwagon

It has been reported that New York City Mayor Michael “So Rich Nothing Really Matters Anymore” Bloomberg intends to seek a ban on selling soda in containers larger than 16 ounces. This of course is a ban on drinking soda and not baking soda, which is not to be confused with baking powder, which is almost like cornstarch, but not really. And of course, when I speak of cornstarch it is not to be confused with ironing starch, though I’ve heard you can use cornstarch to iron your shirts which goes a long way in explaining why the leaves on corn stalks are so crisp and wrinkle-free. Continue reading