I’ve never been much of a breakfast eater. You could probably say I’m Break(fast)ing Bad. I think it stems from the trauma of watching my granddad soak saltine crackers in his coffee then place them on his Corn Flakes and peaches. The result is I don’t really care for breakfast foods. I do like your Euro-breakfast foods with their breads and meats and cheeses and Nutellas. But American breakfasts are ho-hum, which is one step below hi-ho. There’s nothing exciting about pancakes and I never cared for eggs partly because they come out of a chicken’s butt. But like most things that come out of a chicken’s butt, I guess they taste okay if you put enough cheese and hot sauce on them. Asian breakfasts with their mystery slimes are right out.
I grew up eating sugary cereals and Pop Tarts for breakfast and heading off to school in all my ADHD glory. I never ate breakfast in high school, though I probably would have if I were in a club with Molly Ringwald. Continue reading