With apologies to Lee Greenwood (background music Lynx):
If the line is around the corner,
You’d think they’d spring to life.
And help me get home again
To see my children and my wife.
But just one checkpoint’s open;
I’ve been standin’ here all day.
I could sure go for a Starbucks,
But they’d just take that away.
And I’m proud to be an American,
Where at least I know I’m free.
Unless I’m about to board a plane,
–Then I’m assumed guilty.
I must take my shoes off,
Disrobe, then put my body on display.
‘Cause there ain’t no power like this man has,
God bless the TSA.
I finally get my frisking
As they view my nudity.
It’s 90 minutes later,
And man, I’ve got to pee.
I sprint down through the terminal
From concourse G to A.
And I stagger up to my scheduled gate
As the airplane pulls away.
And I’m proud to miss my flight home again
Thanks to Airport Security.
They just putz around while I wait in line
To lose my dignity.
And I’ll take my shoes off!
Disrobe, then put my body on display.
Hey! Where did that guy just put his hand?!
God bless the TSA.
(Key change)
And I’m proud to miss my flight home again
Thanks to Airport Security.
They just putz around while I wait in line
To lose my dignity.
And I’ll take my shoes off!
Disrobe, then put my body on display.
Hey! Where did that guy just put his hand?!
God bless…the…T…S…AAAAAAA!.
A comment worthy blog. Your muse must have hit you so hard with these lyrics you couldn’t wait until next week to release this post eh? Can’t say that I blame you – this is a “goodun!” Climbing the Billboard Bloggers Top 100 with a bullet. : )
LikeLike
Good to see you back, Paul 🙂 I’ve missed the QOTW
LikeLike
I like the key change. I think it makes the ending that much more powerful! 🙂
LikeLike
Looks like you’ve had a little extra time on your hands lately. You made us chuckle here!
LikeLike
LOL – very creative!
LikeLike
I think I like your lyrics better than the original’s (but I’m still very patriotic).
LikeLike
Thanks. Both make you weep, but for different reasons.
LikeLike