Don’t Hate Me For Trying To Spread A Little Hope

Thanks to that bastion of truth, Social Media, it has come to my attention that yesterday (4 Feb) was World Cancer Day—not to be confused with National Cancer Survivors Day which is June 7th or National Cancer Prevention Month which is the entire month of February—not to be confused with Breast Cancer Awareness Month which is October.  We of course are all aware of Breast Cancer Awareness Month because that is the month wherein we dress up to race for cures and men everywhere are adjusting their sets because the NFL looks like Valentine’s sprinkles.

Personally, I think that if we took the millions spent on pink crap every October and actually used it to fund research we would have had a cure years ago, but…then we wouldn’t feel like we were actually doing something helpful for those who are suffering by temporarily wearing a pink tie and/or boa and/or, in the case of J. Lo, Continue reading

The Best of TIM’s Best of 2014

Happy New Year!  Today marks the beginning of a new tradition here at conTIMplating that is bound to last upwards of one year in a row!  In the past, during the last week of the year, I have daily posted on my personal Facebook wall hi-lights of the previous year in terms of ‘Best ofs’ such as Best Book Read or Best Movie Seen or Best Comeback Thought Of A Week Later or Best Abbreviation For A Latin Phrase Meaning ‘And So Forth’, etc., etc.

To illustrate my desire for equality and unity, I have decided to yoke said numerous wall posts together into one culminating conglomerate blog post that singularly covers my multiple personally favored favorites of this past year entitled

The Best of TIMs Best of 2014 (see above) Continue reading

The Best Holiday Travel Guide I Have Written All Day Yet

Well according to the likes of Perry Como, Ed Ames and Andy Williams, it’s that time of year when everyone starts going over the river and through the woods heading for Pennsylvania and some homemade pumpkin pie.  So what better way to serve my fellow man and bring peace on earth than to share from my vast experience of being somewhere else and offer some useful and very alliterated helpful Hannukah holiday travel tips?  So here goes…

HOLIDAY TRAVEL TIP #1:  Do not travel.

This is actually the only tip I have to offer but admittedly, it is born of genius. If my life experience has taught me anything, Continue reading

Your Very Own conTIMplating Holiday Gift Guide

An underrated gift idea.  Collect all 32 varieties!

An underrated gift idea. Collect all 32!

Well Fa-la-la, Rumpa-pum-pum, and Ring-ting-tingling too!  Nonsense syllables are flying around higher than a paint-sniffing reindeer and The Carpenters are actually getting radio play!  This can only mean it’s that time of year when we once again don our red hats and roll up our Greensleeves and get our shop on for the purpose of celebrating Christmas your preferred inoffensive non-specific winter holiday of good feelings and cheer!  Yahoo*!

*(The aforementioned exclamation of enthusiastic holiday merriment is neither endorsed by nor affiliated with the popular internet portal.  Thank you for not suing me.)

Now I know that getting that perfect gift for that special someone is a bigger hassle than doing one’s hair in the late 80s, so I have wasted upwards of numerous minutes to provide the followers of this very fine blog of electronic wonderment with a time-saving and awe-inspiring

conTIMplating Holiday Gift Guide For Gift Givers Who Give Gifts To People Who In Turn Receive Said Gifts Continue reading

The First conTIMplating Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown

We have a tradition here in the conTIMplating home that every Christmas before bowing to the idol of excessive consumption, we read the story of The First Christmas and revel in all of its bell-jingling yuletide merriness.  But never before our November gluttonous ode to gratitude have we sat down and reminded ourselves of The First Thanksgiving.  So by golly, this year I am going to use the expression ‘by golly’ more often and do something about it.  And you can too!  Simply gather about the victual-laden tabletop, get out your various electronic devices that are out anyway, and read aloud to one another in your best Charlton Heston voice this,

The First conTIMplating Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown

Continue reading